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Sarah Mitchell — Reviewed writer, former magazine editor
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How to Handle Make Your Wife Happy Step by Step

When make your wife happy leaves you confused, worried, or unsure what it means, a clear step-by-step approach can help you sort the signal from the stress. This guide explains how to understand the situation, reflect on what matters, choose a practical next step, and know when to ask for trusted support.

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Part 1

Doing Things For Her

1

Appreciate her.

Appreciate her.
Married couples can get comfortable with each other. This makes them lose some of the intense connection that made them get married in the first place. To prevent this from happening to you, tell you wife every day how much you appreciate her. When she walks into a room, let her know that you know she is there. Give her a passionate kiss when you both wake up in the morning or she comes home from work. Let her know that you know she is there and still feel the connection between the two of you.
  • Married couples can get comfortable with each other.
  • This makes them lose some of the intense connection that made them get married in the first place.
  • To prevent this from happening to you, tell you wife every day how much you appreciate her.
  • When she walks into a room, let her know that you know she is there.
  • Give her a passionate kiss when you both wake up in the morning or she comes home from work.
2

Tell her you love her.

Tell her you love her.
Something as simple as telling your wife you love her can make her happy. Everyday life can get crazy and small things like this can get lost in the shuffle. You may say it every day out of habit, but say it like you mean it. Look her in the eyes before you leave the house and tell her you love her. Let her know that you are saying it because you feel it and not out of habit. She knows deep down you love her but hearing you say it with conviction will make her feel it too.
  • Something as simple as telling your wife you love her can make her happy.
  • Everyday life can get crazy and small things like this can get lost in the shuffle.
  • You may say it every day out of habit, but say it like you mean it.
  • Look her in the eyes before you leave the house and tell her you love her.
  • Let her know that you are saying it because you feel it and not out of habit.
3

Buy her a gift.

Buy her a gift.
Surprise your wife every so often with a gift. It doesn't have to be elaborate or expensive. You can give her a small present that lets her know you were thinking about her. Show up at home with a box of chocolates. Pick her a bouquet of flowers on your way home from work. Buy her that book she has in her online wishlist. Notice what she says she'd like to have and surprise her by buying it for her. Not only will she love the gift you give her, she will be happy that you thought enough about her to get it. [2] X Research source
  • Surprise your wife every so often with a gift.
  • It doesn't have to be elaborate or expensive.
  • You can give her a small present that lets her know you were thinking about her.
  • Show up at home with a box of chocolates.
  • Pick her a bouquet of flowers on your way home from work.
4

Say thank you.

Say thank you.
A marriage can sometimes suffer from conversations that go something like "I did this, so you have to do that." Don't let your actions towards one another feel like they are payback for some other action. Instead, find time every day to tell your wife thank you for the things she does. Say it in the morning when she puts on the pot of coffee. Tell her thank you when she picks up the dry cleaning after work when you have a meeting. No matter what the occasion, let her know that you see what she does for you.
  • A marriage can sometimes suffer from conversations that go something like "I did this, so you have to do that." Don't let your actions towards one another feel like they are payback for some other action.
  • Instead, find time every day to tell your wife thank you for the things she does.
  • Say it in the morning when she puts on the pot of coffee.
  • Tell her thank you when she picks up the dry cleaning after work when you have a meeting.
  • No matter what the occasion, let her know that you see what she does for you.
5

Give her space.

Give her space.
You were both single people before you got married. Just because you now share a life doesn't mean that you have to share every interest you both have with each other. Give her time to write all day in the den if she wants. Let her go to the gym by herself. Give her the space she needs to work on the interests that she has that are separate from you. She will appreciate the time to recharge and be happier for it.
  • You were both single people before you got married.
  • Just because you now share a life doesn't mean that you have to share every interest you both have with each other.
  • Give her time to write all day in the den if she wants.
  • Let her go to the gym by herself.
  • Give her the space she needs to work on the interests that she has that are separate from you.
6

Let her decide.

Let her decide.
There are many small decisions in a marriage every day. It can be something small like choosing what you have for dinner. Ask her what she wants to have for dinner. Let her choose what movie you see on date night. Give her the remote when you sit down to watch TV at night. Play her favorite game on game night. Letting her know that her opinion matters and that you care enough about her to let her decide will make her happy.
  • There are many small decisions in a marriage every day.
  • It can be something small like choosing what you have for dinner.
  • Ask her what she wants to have for dinner.
  • Let her choose what movie you see on date night.
  • Give her the remote when you sit down to watch TV at night.
7

Write her love letters.

Write her love letters.
Writing love letters may seem scary, but it is a simple and effective way to make her happy. You don't have to be a gifted writer, just tell her how you feel. Let her know the things about her that you love and how she makes you feel. Tell her that you can't imagine your life without her in it. Explain how you don't work right without her in your life. Keep it simple by telling her how her laugh is the best sound in the world or how much you love the way her hair tickles you at night when you sleep.
  • Writing love letters may seem scary, but it is a simple and effective way to make her happy.
  • You don't have to be a gifted writer, just tell her how you feel.
  • Let her know the things about her that you love and how she makes you feel.
  • Tell her that you can't imagine your life without her in it.
  • Explain how you don't work right without her in your life.
Part 2

Working On Your Relationship

1

Compliment her to others.

Compliment her to others.
When you and your wife meet new people, introduce her in a complimentary way. Use phrases like, "Let me introduce you to my beautiful wife." or "Here is my better half." This lets her know how much she means to you. She will also realize that you want to tell others how much she means to you.
  • When you and your wife meet new people, introduce her in a complimentary way.
  • Use phrases like, "Let me introduce you to my beautiful wife." or "Here is my better half." This lets her know how much she means to you.
  • She will also realize that you want to tell others how much she means to you.
  • When you and your wife meet new people, introduce her in a complimentary way.
  • Use phrases like, "Let me introduce you to my beautiful wife." or "Here is my better half." This lets her know how much she means to you.
2

Have a standing date night.

Have a standing date night.
Going out on dates often get lost in the daily shuffle of married life. Make it a point to have a standing date night with your wife every week. Do something that you both like to do. Try something new on each date night. Go to the movies. Go out for dinner and dancing. It can even be something as simple as a night in without the distractions of everyday life. Turn off your cell phones and make the whole night about the two of you and how much you mean to each other. She will be happy to get away from everything and have a night alone with you.
  • Going out on dates often get lost in the daily shuffle of married life.
  • Make it a point to have a standing date night with your wife every week.
  • Do something that you both like to do.
  • Try something new on each date night.
  • Go to the movies.
3

Offer help.

Offer help.
Ask your wife what you can help her with. Whether it is with the dishes at night or with the children after school, ask her what you can do to make it easier. Take the shopping cart back to the rack after you've gone grocery shopping. Offer to do carpool for the kids on a day she has a presentation at work. It can even be as simple as asking her if you can help take some of the weight off of her by letting her know you are there for her.
  • Ask your wife what you can help her with.
  • Whether it is with the dishes at night or with the children after school, ask her what you can do to make it easier.
  • Take the shopping cart back to the rack after you've gone grocery shopping.
  • Offer to do carpool for the kids on a day she has a presentation at work.
  • It can even be as simple as asking her if you can help take some of the weight off of her by letting her know you are there for her.
4

Listen to her.

Listen to her.
When your wife comes to you with a problem, listen to what she has to say. Don't talk over her, expressing your ire at the situation or talk about how you want to fix it. If she tells you that she is having a problem with someone taking credit for her work at her job, don't start ranting about how unfair it is. You will stop listening to what she has to say and take away the opportunity for her to vent. Let her rage and complain to you, getting out her frustrations.
  • When your wife comes to you with a problem, listen to what she has to say.
  • Don't talk over her, expressing your ire at the situation or talk about how you want to fix it.
  • If she tells you that she is having a problem with someone taking credit for her work at her job, don't start ranting about how unfair it is.
  • You will stop listening to what she has to say and take away the opportunity for her to vent.
  • Let her rage and complain to you, getting out her frustrations.
5

Show affection in public.

Show affection in public.
Some of the initial romance can go out of a relationship once you are married. Bring back some of the early simple forms of affection. Hold her hand as you are walking down the street together. Put your arm around her when you are out to dinner. Kiss her gently as you are waiting to cross the street. These little moments of affection will let her know how much she means to you. She will also know that you don't mind if other people know it.
  • Some of the initial romance can go out of a relationship once you are married.
  • Bring back some of the early simple forms of affection.
  • Hold her hand as you are walking down the street together.
  • Put your arm around her when you are out to dinner.
  • Kiss her gently as you are waiting to cross the street.
6

Do things for her in the bedroom.

Do things for her in the bedroom.
Sexual connection is important in any strong marriage. Don't fall into a routine of having sex at the same time and place every week. Being married gives you time to explore and figure out exactly what she wants and needs from you to please her every desire. Ask her what she wants to do in the bedroom. Mix things up by trying something new and exciting to make her happy.
  • Sexual connection is important in any strong marriage.
  • Don't fall into a routine of having sex at the same time and place every week.
  • Being married gives you time to explore and figure out exactly what she wants and needs from you to please her every desire.
  • Ask her what she wants to do in the bedroom.
  • Mix things up by trying something new and exciting to make her happy.
7

Work on intimacy and passion outside the bedroom.

Work on intimacy and passion outside the bedroom.
Although sexual intimacy is important, there are ways to show passion and intimacy outside of the bedroom. Something simple like seeking her advice about a problem you have at work will bring intimacy to your relationship. Show her how passionate you are about her by taking her in your arms and kissing her while she's doing laundry. Cuddle with her on the couch while you both read a book or listen to music. The closer the two of you are, the happier your wife will be.
  • Although sexual intimacy is important, there are ways to show passion and intimacy outside of the bedroom.
  • Something simple like seeking her advice about a problem you have at work will bring intimacy to your relationship.
  • Show her how passionate you are about her by taking her in your arms and kissing her while she's doing laundry.
  • Cuddle with her on the couch while you both read a book or listen to music.
  • The closer the two of you are, the happier your wife will be.
8

Talk to her.

Talk to her.
Always being silent with your wife will make her feel disconnected from you. Talk to her about how you are feeling. Be open and honest about what you think and feel on a daily basis. Tell her when you feel insecure or upset about something. Let her know if she is hurting your feelings or making you happy. The more honest you are with her, the closer and happier you will be as a couple. [13] X Research source
  • Always being silent with your wife will make her feel disconnected from you.
  • Talk to her about how you are feeling.
  • Be open and honest about what you think and feel on a daily basis.
  • Tell her when you feel insecure or upset about something.
  • Let her know if she is hurting your feelings or making you happy.

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